All Women's Talk

7 Fun Things to do in an Elevator ...

By Neecey

You know, there are lots of fun things to do in an elevator. When I was thinking the other day about the differences between the UK and the USA, I realised that we have lifts and America has elevators. Elevator is probably a more apt name for US buildings because in the UK, our tallest building only has 50 floors and takes 40 seconds to travel top to bottom. UK buildings outside of London and the main cities rarely go over 10 floors, so using the word lift is appropriate. Our lack of elevation also means there is actually very little time to have fun as you ride between floors. So, based on the wonderfully large number of floors in US buildings here’s a few fun things to do in an elevator (best when crowded).

1 Play Twister

Just when you thought the attraction of the game was losing its shine. Here it is re-invented with the added frisson of limited space. You will, however, need the co-operation of other elevator passengers. If the Twister mat doesn't fit, get everybody doing Tai Chi.

2 Initiate a Group Hug

What better way to show your collective love for your fellow human beings? All right, so I think this is a fun thing to do in an elevator. Others might find it slightly bizarre.

3 Treat the Elevator like a Library

Take a book and chair in with you and sit in the corner reading. Whenever anyone speaks put your finger to your lips, shake your head disapprovingly and say shush. Won't that be fun!

4 Be a Bellboy/girl

Not only is this a chance to dress up, and who can pass one of those by, but it’s a great way to spend a day people watching. Choose a really tall, busy office building and listen in to the conversations about secret affairs, missed promotions and office bitching. Who knows, you might even get to play in some industrial espionage. If challenged by someone stating they’ve never seen bellboys in the elevator before, tell them it’s a trial. Many fun things to do in an elevator involve subterfuge.

5 Market Research

Take in a clipboard and ask passengers to complete a short survey of 3 questions. 1. Do you ride the elevator every day? 2. What floor do you normally stop at? 3. Did you have sex last night? Just wait for the reaction. Bet you get more smiles than frowns.

6 Jam the Doors

This is definitely a fun thing to do in an elevator. Make sure the elevator has got a few passengers. Enter with a largish bag, coat over your arm and an archive box. Put the box down just so that it prevents the door closing. Move the box but put your bag down so that stops the door closing. Move that, making sure you put your coat down to once again jam the doors. Do it as naturally as possible so it looks completely haphazard and natural (hide your giggles). Just see how long it is before you hear tuts of exasperation or someone steps in to move it all for you.

7 Flatulence

No self respecting list of elevator jocularity would be complete without the fart. The effect of this is enhanced if you can perfect the fart noise at the same time as surreptitiously opening a pack containing a smelly egg mayonnaise sandwich. Remember, realism is key.

If you have now read a couple of my posts you may be starting to think I’m slightly mad. You wouldn’t be the first but hey, a little madness never hurt anybody. Well, erm, actually, it did. Quite a few people really. Maybe that’s a subject for another day. So anyway – can you think of any other man -- I mean fun things to do in an elevator? Share them with us.

Top Photo Credit: atlexplorer

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