All Women's Talk

7 Ways to Mediate Roommate Conflicts ...

By Hayley

Roommate conflicts are no light matter. Not only is it a fight, which already are no fun; it is an unavoidable issue because you live with the person. As unwanted as they are, roommate conflicts are very common, however, if there are certain steps taken they can be resolved easily. Here are 7 ways to mediate roommate conflicts.

1 Try and Talk to Your Roommate

It really could be that simple. For the sake of things, I hope it is just that simple. If you take the time to sit down and have a personal conversation with your roommate, you might be able to resolve the conflict right then and there. Try to avoid yelling and nasty comments because that will just escalate things to a whole different level. Keep things calm, and don’t dance around the tough subjects. Beating around the bush is definitely not a good thing to go for, you may be sparing feelings but nothing will get accomplished

2 Don’t Involve outside Parties

This is especially important for mediating roommate conflicts. If you get your other friends involved things can get ugly. More times than not the situation will get further blown out of proportion by the mixing of opinions. It is even more important if you share the same circle of friends, the last thing you want to happen is people to take sides and start an all out war.


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3 Talk to Your RA

An RA is around to help out in situations such as this. They are there to be a neutral party in the mediation process. If the job is done right they will act as a buffer for the unnecessary comments and help guide any discussions in the right direction without getting caught up in the intensity of the situation. They are a valuable resource to have should a roommate conflict ever need to be mediated.

4 Keep to Yourself

Being nosy is rarely ever a good thing. If you keep to yourself it’s probably safe to bet that there won’t be an issue. If things are getting heated between you and your roommate, pull back a little. It is better to give a little space to cool down. Doing your own thing is a perfect way to just let things settle down, especially if the conflict is about something that isn’t necessarily a huge ordeal.

5 Rearrange the Room

Sometimes a change of the room you live in can help with a roommate conflict. Dorm rooms are small, and everyone needs their personal space. The best bet is to have your own side, that way you can have your own spot with your decorations and personal items. Keep to your side and it can really help to alleviate a roommate conflict.

6 Respect Each Others Feelings

Everyone has «one of those days» where nothing goes right and their mood is really sour. If that happens, don’t take it personally. That is one of those situations where it is best to let what is said roll right off your back. Things said out of anger usually aren’t meant to be said in the first place. If you end up taking it personally you’ll probably just create more conflict.

7 Set Rules for the Room

An agreement between roommates is a really good way to settle down a conflict. If there are ground rules set for what each person wants, and it is documented then that can always be brought back up if someone is unhappy. It also establishes what is expected of each person as far as a respect level goes.

Like I said it is never an easy task trying to squash a conflict between roommates, but it is very possible to do so. It really comes down to trying your best to stay calm! Are there any other ways you can think of?

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