7 Things You Can do if You Hate Your Name ...

7 Things You Can do if You Hate Your Name ...
By Alison • May 30, 2024

How many of us really love our name? It's strange how we change so many things about our appearance, but stick with the name we were given at birth. Yet often we don't really like our name, and would secretly prefer something different. But what if you really loathe your name and feel so wrong using it? Here are some things you can do if you hate your name …

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1. Consider Why You Hate It

Why do you actually hate your name? Is it because of unpleasant associations, or that it just doesn't feel right for you? Do you dislike it because it's unusual? Work out why you don't like your name. Once you understand the reasons, you may be able to make yourself more comfortable with it.

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Understanding the root of your disdain may give you the tools to reframe your feelings or explain them to others. For instance, if a strikingly distinctive name is the culprit, you might discover pride in its uniqueness over time or recognize the memorable impression it leaves. Conversely, if it doesn't resonate with your sense of self, experimenting with variations or nicknames could offer a sense of control and personal identity. Embracing the story behind your name might also help; knowing it carries a family legacy or a special meaning can transform your perception of it from a burden to an honor.

2. Shorten It

Using a shorter version of your name can make it more palatable. Perhaps you don't like being called Alexandra because it's too long, or you're more of a tomboy type. Some people probably call you Alex already; just ask everyone else to use the shorter version as well. It may take some time for them to get used to the shorter version, but they will do.

3. Use Your Middle Name or Nickname

You can also use a middle name or nickname instead of your first name. For example, if your parents picked an unusual name like Princess, you're not going to be taken very seriously if you want to become a lawyer! Switch to your middle name instead if it's more conventional.

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If using your middle name feels too formal or doesn't quite fit, a nickname can be a fabulous choice. It could be a shortened version of your name or something entirely new that resonates with your personality. Imagine going from Bartholomew to Bart, instantly adopting a vibe that's easier to carry in social situations. It's all about crafting an identity that you're comfortable with and gives you the confidence to make your mark in the world. Remember, it's not just a name; it’s a statement of who you are.

4. Go for a Variation

You might like your name more if you used a variation such as a foreign spelling. Sometimes that will look and feel more 'right'. If your name is Elizabeth, what about changing it to Isabella, which can feel more exotic? Margaret instantly becomes more exciting when turned into Margarita or Greta.

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Consider exploring the etymological roots of your name for inspiration; many names have fascinating histories that might resonate with you. For instance, if Alexander doesn't spark joy, you might find Alessandro or Sasha to be a refreshing twist. Embrace the opportunity to reinvent your identity while still holding on to the essence of your original name. Remember that a slight modification can sometimes make a world of difference in how you perceive and project yourself.

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5. Look for an Inspirational Namesake

Perhaps you didn't like being called Megan because it reminds you of another Megan that you hated at school. Looking for a famous namesake to inspire you can help you see your name in a new light. Enter Megan Fox - who would mind sharing a name with her?

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You can draw inspiration from historical figures, celebrities, or even fictional characters that carry the same name as you. Imagine sharing your moniker with a notable leader like Margaret Thatcher, or a literary heroine such as Elizabeth Bennet. Reflecting on their strengths and achievements can imbue your own name with additional meaning and pride. It's like a touch of their sparkle has been sprinkled onto you. Plus, when introduced, it might spark a delightful conversation about someone you admire, further associating your name with positive, empowering traits.

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6. Change the Spelling

Sometimes a simple change of spelling can make your name feel more comfortable. I'm not that fond of my name, though I've never thought about changing it. But if I wanted I could spell it Allison, Alyson or Allyson. Similarly, Katherine can become Catherine or Katheryn. It might not seem that big a difference, but for some people a different spelling just feels 'right'.

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If you don't like your name, there are a few things you can do to make it feel more comfortable. Changing the spelling of your name is one of the easiest and most effective ways to make your name feel more like you. For example, if your name is Allison, you could spell it Alyson or Allyson. Similarly, Katherine can become Catherine or Katheryn. It may seem like a small change, but for some people, a different spelling can make all the difference.

There are other ways to make your name feel more like you as well. For instance, you could adopt a nickname or alter your name in some other way. You could even create a completely new name for yourself. This is more common than you might think; many people have changed their names to something they felt more connected to.

You can also find ways to make your name more meaningful. For example, you could research the meaning behind your name and find out what it says about you. You could also add a meaningful middle name to your name, or combine two names that you like to create a new name.

7. Choose a New Name

Why should only famous people get to choose the name they want to be known by? If your name doesn't feel right for you, change it. After all, our parents choose a name without knowing the person we'll turn into. So it's not really surprising that we may end up not fitting that name.

You can be known by a new name informally without going through a legal name change. It's up to you. Oh, and apologies to anyone who has the names I've mentioned and loves their name- I'm not suggesting that there's anything wrong with them, but have simply used them as examples for how to pick a 'new' name.

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Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

This is something I really want to do. My birth name, Stephanie (especially being called Steph) makes me feel really angry and upset every time it’s used. I dislike introducing myself with it, writing it, and having other people use it. On the other hand, Jillian feels like the most beautiful name in the world to me, and I love the nickname Jill. If anyone here is thinking of changing their name, go for it. You’ll be letting yourself down if you go through life with a name and identity you dislike. ❤️

#3 I don't have a middle name. But I'm Chinese so I was given both an 'english name' and a name in chines –– both of which I don't like. My Chinese name was given with the word 妃 in mind (not the actual character used), while literally means wife of an emperor/prince. Ew that screams the patriarchy so naturally I'm not that fond of it. I don't feel culturally nor emotionally connected to my names, and because I actually grew up in China I don't feel like my name is part of my cultural identity in any way.

It is my last name that I do not like. This is because when we came to this country we took a different name in order to blend in. But for me, I have no ownership of this name. Now my last relative has died, I am changing my name legally. After much thought over my life, I am dropping the surname and moving my middle name to be my surname.

my name is naomi what should i shorten it too (not omi because i want that to be something only family and close friends call me)

#3 If you don't like your middle name either?..

I changed my first name around with my middle name .. Legally , about 18 years ago

I’m black and my name is a basic black girl name. Jada Marie G**** (g as in go), my father's last name. I was named after Jada Pickett smith, who I don’t care for really. My middle name is the same as my mother’s, but so is 50% of other girls with the middle name Marie! I want a more individualized name. I knew six other girls with the name Jada, and who knows how many more with the middle name Marie. It’s not “me”. I’ve chosen a last name already: a mix of my father’s first three letters and my mother’s last three last letters in their last names.

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