Friendship is tricky, and not all friendships will carry throughout your life. That's why you've got to know the signs of a toxic friendship. Friends should embrace you as you are and help inspire you to pursue your wildest dreams. You can get sucked into a toxic friendship that makes you question yourself. Here are 10 signs of a toxic friendship to be on the lookout for.
1 Embarrassed by Your Passions
You should be allowed to be yourself in friendships. If you ever find yourself trying to conceal your dreams or interests it may be a sign that your friendship is not true. Not being truthful inspires lies and could ultimately set you on a path away from your goals. If you're embarrassed around a person, it's definitely one of the signs of a toxic friendship.
2 All That Talk
Gossip can be addictive and we all fall prey to it at times. But, have you ever had a friend where gossip was her only way to communicate. If she talks bad about all her friends to you, do you think there’s an unwritten rule that she would never talk bad about you? Gossip queens create anxiety and self-loathing when you don’t know what secrets of yours are being spread around town.
3 Negative Thinking
Now, we can’t be optimistic all the time but constant negativity can create a drag on your life. If you are constantly around negative discussions about love, body, goals, school, etc., you will begin to think negatively yourself. This can develop into self-negativity and can separate you from positive outcomes that you may wish away with your negatives.
4 Competing Friends
Social competition is natural, but it is certainly not necessary. Have you ever been friends with a queen bee who ultimately stereotypes those around her as ‘best’ or ‘worst’ at something? Being defined in this way can become a self-fulfilling prophecy if you start to believe it. Friends should be accepting and shouldn't try to categorize others or make friends believe they are less than another.
5 No Trust
Boys can lead to conflicts between friends. But are you unfairly untrusting or set on the back burner when it comes to relationships with boys? It can be something as small as getting the eyes or even a text about you taking a picture with the boy she likes. Or, if whenever a boy you have a crush on comes around and your friend is all over him. If there lacks a possibility of trust with boys it will ultimately explode down the line and you have to think about if it is worth it.
6 All about #1
You are supposed to always hype your friend up, listen to her problems, cater to her demands, and follow along on her whims. What about you? What do you want? What do you like? Can you even remember? You deserve to have the world too, not just her world.
7 Afraid to Speak Your Mind
Friendship connections are about heart and personalities. You should not be judged for interests or opinions you may have. Now obviously you shouldn’t go shoving your opinions down someone’s throat, but you should feel confident to politely disagree or not be scared to say the wrong thing and thus lose a friend. Being friends doesn’t mean you have to agree on everything, it just means you should have mutual respect for each other.
Friends come in all shapes and sizes and from various places in your life. You should feel independent in your friendship so that you can have time for other friends, and for yourself. If you constantly feel shaded when you hang out with friends from work or friends from a class instead of hanging with your ‘real’ friends it may be time to analyze how ‘real’ that friendship really is.
9 All on Social
Sharing friendship on social media is one of the benefits of such apps. Who doesn’t want to share a hot picture of you and your girl going out at night? But if you find yourself being featured on an Instagram feed but feel a lack of attention or reliability in your friend, this could be a sign that your friend does not really value you in the long run.
10 Unnecessary Expectations
Do you have to text your friend every day to keep her in their inner ranks? Do you have to buy gifts or prove your friendship in some way that does not seem realistic? If there are expectations that you find to be excessive, it may be time to rethink the friendship in order to save your own emotional health. Competition and expectations among friends only breeds animosity and anxiety.