From college to your first few years of total adult independence, it is pretty likely that you are going to have your fair share of housemates through those years. For the most part, having housemates is super fun, you can make lifelong friends and have formative experiences together, but we all know that that isn’t always the case! Sometimes, you are unfortunate enough to be stuck with a housemate who you want nothing more than to move on! Here is how to get rid of an unwanted housemate.
Turn yourself into the most annoying morning person in the world, up and loud at 6 am every day. The more annoying you can be, the more likely the housemate will be to want to leave of their own accord!
Get yourself a pet, but not a cute pet - some sort of spider or lizard or snake that your housemate will want to get as far away from as possible! Even better, just borrow one from a friend so you can give it back after your mission is accomplished!
If you have a partner, start having them round more and more until it feels like they have literally moved in. Hopefully it will encroach on your housemate’s personal space and force them out!
Force them to look for a home elsewhere by being an absolute criminal in the fridge. Pay no mind to name labels and special leftovers, consider everything as fair game and hopefully you will drive them to the point of no return!
Basically, just temporarily become the person that you hate. Be loud, be messy, be disrespectful of personal space, do everything in your power to make it seem to the undesirable housemate that living with you is the worst possible thing in the world!