It’s not that hard to learn how to not dwell on your past, you just need to put a little work into it, have some patience and you will be delighted by the results. Sometimes it’s pretty pointless to keep wondering what could have been if you would have done this or that, because dwelling on your past won’t help you solve any of your problems. You could only get more depressed or sad, unless you do something in order to break this cycle. I absolutely love this quote, whose author is still unknown: “A bend in the road is not the end of the road…unless you fail to make the turn.” In order to live in the present and focus on the wonderful things you have, here are a few pretty useful tips on how to not dwell on your past you should always keep in mind:
1. Your past is Just a Memory Now
One of the most effective tips on how to not dwell on your past I could give you is to advise you to look at what happened in your past and realize that now, all that is just a memory that can’t actually affect your present, or at least you shouldn’t let it. What’s done is done and sadly, there's no turning back. Just accept that you’ve made the best decisions with the resources you had at that time. Don’t beat yourself up, and think about saving your energy for those wonderful things you will do in the future!
If you did something wrong or if you’ve hurt somebody’s feelings, just apologize, admit your mistakes and ask for forgiveness. If this doesn’t happen and you can’t restore the relationship you had with that person, allow yourself to be sad for a little while, but try to avoid dwelling on your past. After all, you never know what will happen in your future; maybe that person will change their mind and they will forgive you someday.
3. Find a Hobby
The best way to take your mind off the things that bother you is by finding a new hobby that will allow you to meet more people (and this way, you will improve your social skills). That will help you enrich your abilities and you will even learn some new skills that might come in handy someday in your future. Spend your time by doing something you enjoy, instead of being focused only on the things that happen in your past, which you cannot change anymore.
4. Make Plans for the Future
Even though you don’t feel like doing this right now, you should still make an effort. Try to make plans for the future, because this will help you fell more optimistic and it will also prevent you from being stuck in that past that you cannot change, no matter how hard you try. Be ambitious and think about those dreams you’ve always wanted to fulfill! Well, now it’s your time to shine, so do everything in you power to reach your goals and don’t let your past interfere with your happiness!
5. Spend More Time with Your Loved Ones
Instead of always dwelling on your past and wondering what could have been, try to spend more time with your loved ones. They will surely help you forget all about those things from your past that have been on your mind lately. Spend more time with your friends and family because after all, they are the ones who love you unconditionally. You will feel less alone and they will help you find the strength you need in order to deal with all those problems from your past, so you won’t be bothered by them anymore.
6. This Pain Won’t Last Forever
Even if you feel quite miserable right now, try to understand that this pain won’t last forever and that things will get better in time. Don’t worry so much about what happened in your past, focus on your future and on not making the same mistakes again. You are more experienced now, the pain will go away eventually and you will see that what now means the world to you will become a distant memory that won’t affect you anymore.
7. Toss All Those Unpleasant Memories in a Box and Close It
The best way to avoid dwelling on your past too much is by simply tossing all those unpleasant and unwanted memories in an imaginary box and closing it. This way, you won’t allow your past to haunt you anymore and you will be able to live in the present and focus on the wonderful things that will happen to you in the future. Simply shut that box and revisit it when you will have a different mindset that will help you see things more clearly and in a more mature way.
There are things you simply cannot change no matter how hard you try. Sometimes you just need to accept that, in order to allow yourself to move on and make new memories. Do you know any other helpful tips on how to not dwell on your past that you could share with us? Please tell us about them in the comments section!