Do people tease you a lot, and do you get upset? It's so annoying when people say 'oh, I'm only teasing you!', as if you've no right to be upset and should learn to take a joke! Teasing can actually be quite mean and thoughtless, and you don't have to put up with it. So if you get teased, remember these points …
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People Can Be Very Insensitive
Some people are very insensitive, and oblivious to the fact that they're annoying or upsetting you. They're just not thinking about your feelings and that their teasing might cause offence. So the fault is with them, not with you for being upset. You're entitled to your feelings, and nobody should decide for you how you should feel.
Bullies Will Pick on Anything
Teasing can actually be a form of bullying, if it's picking on something that they know you're sensitive about. That's exactly what bullies do; they pick on something that they know will upset you. It could be anything, so it's not your fault. They'll just find something to get at you about.
Frequently asked questions
You've a Right to Be Annoyed
If people tell you that you should have a sense of humour, they're implying that you have no right to be upset at their teasing. You do. They know that they're upsetting you, so they're going on the defensive and trying to blame you for your reaction. That's not right. You are entitled to your feelings, and it's not for them to tell you how you should feel.
It's Not about You
Teasing isn't really about you. People who continue to tease you when you've made it clear you don't like it are showing how insensitive they are. It's not you that's at fault, but them. So put the responsibility firmly where it belongs, and don't let anyone tell you that you shouldn't be offended.
Sometimes It's Best to Ignore People when They Tease You
Sometimes, people tease you because they're looking for a response. They want to upset you and get a reaction. If you don't respond, you're denying them what they want. So the best option can be to simply ignore them; they'll soon give up when they realise they're wasting their time.
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… and Sometimes You Should Make It Clear You Want Them to Stop
On the other hand, sometimes it's best to make it clear that you want them to stop. If they're simply insensitive, calling them out will bring it home to them that they're being an idiot. Tell them that you want them to stop. It may make them realise that they're doing something that bothers you.
Turn the Tables
You could even try turning the tables and teasing the person who teases you. They're bound to have something they're sensitive about, so give them a taste of their own medicine and see how they like it! Then if they're upset about being teased, you can point out that's exactly how you feel about what they said …
So if you get teased, try to judge which of these is the best option. At any rate, you have every right to want people to stop teasing you. Nobody should tell you how to react, so if you don't like it that's fair enough.
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