All Women's Talk

7 Ways to Deal with Someone You Don't Want to Be Friends with ...

By Alison

Do you need some ways to deal with someone you don't want to be friends with? It's really rather awkward when someone wants to make friends with you but you don't really click with them. Sometimes they try a bit too hard to be your friend, and you don't want to bluntly tell them you're not interested. But how can you diplomatically deter someone? Here are some ways to deal with someone you don't want to be friends with:

1 Be Firm

One of the ways to deal with someone you don't want to be friends with is to be firm and not cave in. Giving in to someone who is persistent will just mean that you end up maintaining a 'friendship' that doesn't mean anything and resenting the other person for imposing themselves on you. Don't let it start, and you won't have to finish it.

2 Remain Friendly

Even if you don't want to be friends with someone, you should still maintain a courteous attitude towards them. There's a difference between being friends and being friendly; the latter doesn't mean that you'll be encouraging them. You can still be civil, so try to resist being rude in an attempt to put them off.

3 Impose Limits

If you don't mind this person too much, but you just don't want to be friends with them, try setting limits on your dealings with them. Perhaps you don't mind hanging around with them as part of a group, or having the occasional coffee. If so, try to ensure that you only see them under these circumstances.

4 Avoid Them

Some persistent would-be friends really don't get the hint, and keep on trying to make friends with you. In such a situation, avoiding them may be the best option. Above all, make sure that they don't get hold of your number, or you could be fielding calls all the time. This can also be the best way of dealing with someone who is offended that you don't return their interest.

5 Be Unavailable

If someone you don't want to be friends with gets hold of your number don't answer their calls. It may be a bit cowardly to avoid answering them, but eventually they will get the message and stop calling. And if they ask you face to face if you want to do something on a specific date, tell them you're not free then.

6 Be Busy

Don't feel guilty about saying no to someone if you don't have the time or inclination to be friends with them. It's kinder to both of you than going along with something you don't want to do. If they invite you to something directly, then explain that you are too busy at the moment, even if you have to do so every time they ask.

7 Find Them Another Friend

Perhaps you really don't have anything in common with this person, but you know someone else who does. In that case, you could play friend matchmaker and introduce them. And if they don't want to be friends either, simply give them the link to this article and they'll know what to do!

You don't have to be friends with someone if you don't want to, so don't feel obliged. Just be polite about explaining that you don't have time/would rather not meet for coffee etc. Have you ever been pestered by someone who wouldn't take no for an answer?

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