I believe it’s very useful knowing how to deal with someone yelling at you, since there are a lot of difficult or even impossible people out there who have no problem with being rude to the ones around them. This situation can be extremely unpleasant, especially if the person who is shouting at you is someone you care deeply about, like a family member, one of your friends or even your significant other. No matter what you did that made the other person so upset, I believe that yelling is not justified and that you can learn how to solve a conflict by being more assertive. Taylor Swift was absolutely right when she said that “If you're yelling you're the one who's lost control of the conversation.” So, here are a few pretty useful tips on how to deal with someone yelling at you that will help you remain calm in order to solve that conflict in no time:
1. Say Nothing
One of the best tips I could give you on how to deal with someone yelling at you is to advise to try to just stay calm and say nothing. Look that person straight in the eyes and just sit there in absolute silence, in order to show them how much their behavior is bothering you and how offensive it is. They will notice your attitude and they will just run out of steam and realize that the way they approach that situation is actually wrong.
2. Explain Why Their Behavior is Bothering You
I know it can be hard sometimes to remain calm when someone is shouting at you, but it’s essential to do it so you can explain the other person why their behavior is bothering you. You could tell them how hard it is to concentrate on what they are saying if they are screaming, because you are not able to focus and understand the meaning of their words. Maybe this way, they will understand that what they are doing is wrong and they might even apologize for their inappropriate behavior.
3. Touch Them
Well, this works only if you are close to that person, because if you two are almost total strangers, they might misinterpret your behavior as being inappropriate or even hostile. So, be careful to whom you are doing this! If they are one of your friends or your significant other, you could try to gently touch their face because by doing this, you’ll show them how much you care about them and how much they mean to you. If they are not so close to you, then you could try touching their arm as a friendly gesture or one of good will. This trick always works, since it’s rather hard to yell at someone who is being friendly and kind to you, or someone who is showing you how important you are to them.
4. Walk Away
When someone is yelling at you, one of the simplest and most effective things you can do is to simply walk away and show that person how much their attitude is bothering you. Of course, you can’t do that if the person shouting is one of your parents, your significant other or your boss, because you will only seem disrespectful and make them even angrier. On the other hand, by walking away, you will give the other person some time to calm down and re-evaluate the situation. Just be careful not to hurt their feelings if you choose to do this.
5. Ask Them to Stop
Another very easy way to diffuse a yeller is by simply asking them to stop, by telling them that they are making you feel uncomfortable and that you cannot pay attention to what they are saying. Some people might not even be aware of how they are behaving. You will only help them realize that their behavior is inappropriate, and that even if they are upset or angry, they should still control their temper and behave in a more assertive manner.
6. Talk Softly
I know this may seem a bit silly but I assure you that it really works. Apparently, a lot of research showd that if you talk very softly when someone is yelling at you, even to the point where they ask you to speak a little louder, you will distract the yeller from the thing that is bothering them or stressing them out. They will shift their attention to your conversation because they will try to understand the meaning of your words, and this might make them calm down and use a proper tone of voice.
7. Don’t Back Talk
I know how tempting this may be sometimes, especially when someone is yelling at you, but try to control your urges and don’t snap back at the other person, because you will only make them angrier and they won’t even listen to what you have to say. Just keep your comments to yourself and search for other ways to deal with that situation.
I know how difficult it can be sometimes to restrain yourself when you’re dealing with someone who’s yelling at you but it’s not impossible. With a bit of practice and with a lot of patience, you will learn how to behave in a more assertive manner and how to control your temper in every situation, so you won’t hurt anyone’s feelings. How do you deal with someone who’s shouting at you? Please share your advice with us in the comments section! I can’t wait to hear your ideas!