Have you ever considered that the ways women treat men can also be sexist? We complain quite rightly if men treat us in a sexist fashion, but if we look at our own behavior we are often not guiltless ourselves. Here are some of the ways women treat men that we should be aware of …
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1. Female Careers
One of the sexist ways women treat men is when it comes to careers. We complain that certain careers are male dominated, and yet regard others as something only women should do. If a man wants to be a nurse or look after children, for example, he is seen as less masculine and should do something more suitable for a man.
2. Helpless
Women can also see men as essentially overgrown children who are incapable of looking after themselves. They can't cook, clean, mend their clothes, buy socks, or pick up the right groceries. But is this really true? Certainly some men aren't good at these tasks, but we shouldn't assume that no man is capable of doing these basic things.
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3. Stereotypes
Be honest - have you ever muttered "they're all the same" when referring to men? Because all men can fix the car, want to play the field, and like to get drunk at weekends, right? Well, no. Some only want a committed relationship, hardly drink at all, and have no idea about what goes on under the hood of a car. We don't want men to stereotype us, and we shouldn't do the same to them.
4. Can't Look after Kids
And how often do women assume that a man has no idea how to look after kids? Even mothers may be reluctant to leave a father in charge of his own baby. Many men are actually great with kids, including those that don't have kids of their own. And it's not because they're really only big kids themselves.
5. Household Jobs
The popular image is that women get burdened with more of the household chores, even though they work full time. This may or may not be true. But how often do we treat men as if they can't do certain household tasks? Don't we also push them into doing strenuous jobs and leave the lighter tasks for ourselves? Girls, we have to do our share of mowing the lawn and moving furniture.
6. Advertising
Advertising also treats men in a sexist fashion - it's not just women that experience this. Men are shown as helpless creatures and often ridiculed. They make a mess of the house and need a woman to rescue them. It's fair to assume that women are behind some of these commercials …
7. Presumptions
We think we know men and what they want from life. This isn't really fair, and is another example of how we put men into the same category. Men are just as complicated as women are. Don't assume anything about a man based simply on his gender.
We are doing men and ourselves a disservice if we assume that they never experience sexism. I haven't even mentioned examples like men in the media and law. Is it right, for example, that men are named when falsely accused of rape, yet the woman remains anonymous? How do you think we are sexist towards men?
Comments
Ellie: I agree that we also stereotype men but in a much less harmful way than we do women. In reference to number 1, I don't think this is particularly unfair to men seeing as most other careers (particularly high paying, management style ones) are seen as best fulfilled by men and not women. It's good to look at the argument from both sides and be open mined but we have to remember that in terms of sexism and stereotyping women get the brunt of it and it often comes in much more serious forms for women, I think we should still keep focus on what feminism is aiming to do, making the world a fairies and SAFER place for women.
Charlotte: It's true. Allowing men to be more free (and less tied to masculine dogma) is an important aspect of feminism that is often overlooked. Great piece!
samuel: me and women are equal im not better neither are you women dont say you're better
Tabitha: We are forgetting the victim shaming that takes place
Ashleigh: What this article fails to highlight is that sexism is maintained through various institutions that legitimize discrimination and oppression. Which with the exception of the first example of careers, none of the examples given by the author fit this criteria. Even saying that women are sexist towards men with their career choices is a weak argument when one realizes that most of the jobs deemed "women's work" were created as such because of the lack of careers for women during the second and first waves of feminism. So if men are excluded from occupations it's often because of the patriarchal system, and not the fault of women.
Elena: Heck yes! Every one of my friends says thing like this and I won't lie I do too, and we say that they are sexist!
Kaiser: Very well written.
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