I’ve known a drama queen for over ten years that ambushes anyone with a fierce and lengthy emotional tirade when things don’t go her way, so I’ve had to learn ways to deal with drama queens to save my sanity. Maybe you know a drama queen and if you haven’t, at some point you will. This kind of person will happily suck the peace and happiness out of your life, so it’s best to learn some helpful ways to deal with drama queens.
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Starve the Verbal Fire
Think of a conversation with a drama queen as a roaring fire. She needs you to say something either positive or negative to feed that fire. If you don’t say anything, this fire will slowly die down. One of the ways to deal with drama queens is to avoid getting involved in her emotional theatrics.
Think of a conversation with a drama queen as a roaring fire. She needs you to say something either positive or negative to feed that fire. If you don’t say anything, this fire will slowly die down. Instead of engaging, offer non-committal responses or simply nod. By maintaining a neutral stance, you’ll deny her the emotional fuel she craves. Remaining calm and detached can dissipate her theatrics. It's crucial to not let her provoke a reaction from you. Remember, silence can be a powerful tool. Over time, she may seek drama elsewhere where it’s more readily fed.
Limit Time
It’s difficult when someone closest to you is a drama queen, such as a sister, mother or a friend. She will suck you into her soap opera life until you are emotionally exhausted. The key is to limit the amount of time you have contact with her. So if she calls you, tell her that you only have 15 minutes to talk and you are extremely busy.
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Keep It Professional
If you have a co-worker that is a drama queen, she can’t be easily avoided. In this case, the best thing to do is to keep it as professional as possible. Never ask her how she is doing. If you don’t ask for information on her life, she will go suck the life energy out of someone else. Keep conversation to the minimum and limit it to work topics.
Don’t Confront Her
One of the worst things to do with this life vampire is to tell her that she is a drama queen or is seeking attention. This is only going to put her on the defensive. Plus it will enrage a drama queen and give her fuel to start a brand new drama. Do not belittle her feelings no matter how minor her problem because to her its grounds to start a war with you.
Try Sympathizing
Instead of telling her that she is obnoxious for acting the way she is over such a trivial problem, give her a bit of sympathy. But just a bit. If you give her too much, it will just encourage her to go on with her emotionally charged diatribe. Just say: “I’m sorry that happened to you” or “I don’t know what to say” then walk away.
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Deep Breathing
When sucked into a conversation with a drama queen, take long deep breaths. At times, it’s also necessary to bite your tongue. For example, once I got a late night call from the drama queen in my life who was going on and on because she couldn’t find her favorite hat. Although I could have pointed out that there was homeless people that don’t even own a hat, I didn’t. If I had, it would have just encouraged a brand new woe-is-me drama scene from her.
Make a Choice
Some drama queens are tolerable and entertaining. But there are others that suck the energy out of a room like an emotional tornado wherever they go, leaving everyone miserable. In that case, you have to make a choice. For the sake of your well-being, it may be necessary to cut all ties with her.
Hopefully my suggestions help you stay happy and balanced even when an emotional vampire is in your life. Can you share other ways that have helped you deal with a drama queen?
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