If you’ve ever had someone hurt you, chances are seeing someone that hurt you for the first time again is one of the hardest things you’ll go through. We’ve all had those moments where we’re out having the perfect day, just going for a walk, browsing through our favorite store, or buying some groceries, and we look up only to see someone that has hurt us greatly. A pain shoots through your heart and you want to run and flee, yet lash out angrily at the same time. It is a hard rush of emotions to deal with, as I’m sure many of you know. I’ve been there, like many of you, so here are some ways I’d like to share for how to handle seeing someone that hurt you from your past. Don’t cry, run or yell, but instead, try these tips.
1 Breathe
For starters, when first seeing someone that hurt you from your past, stop and take a deep breath. Give yourself a break and accept that you’re seeing them and going to have to deal with certain emotions. Realize that this was bound to happen sooner or later, and take a deep breath before you proceed.
2 Don’t Hide from Them
Whatever you do, don’t hide behind a shelf or display, hoping they won’t see you. Though it might work, it might not, and then you’ll just be embarrassed. Plus, seeing them can actually help you move on. You’ll be able to deal with emotions you might have pushed away and finally be able to move on.
I’m not asking you to go up and hug them, but approach the person with a normal, genuine smile. It implies you’re fine, happy and moving on with your life in a positive direction and that you’re a grown up.
4 Say Hello
If appropriate, say hello to them. Nothing elaborate, just a friendly hello will do the job just fine. You can say “How are you?” if you like, but don’t feel the need to start a conversation. You can be cordial without making it seem like you’re totally over what they did to you.
5 Don’t Linger
If someone really hurt you, don’t linger around them, pretending that it’s okay for them to do what they did and just walk all over you. After being cordial, move on and proceed ahead. It implies you’re not only physically moving on, but emotionally too.
6 Be Proud of Yourself
You should be proud of yourself that you’ve finally faced the person. If they made it impossible to just walk away from them and you had to talk to them for more than a minute, be proud that you didn’t break down crying. This is the moment you’re able to start moving on and let go of the pain they caused you.
7 Let It Go
Lastly, now that you’ve seen this person who hurt you, it is time to let it go. The hardest part of suffering hurt is not being without the person after they hurt you, but seeing them after they did, such as in a friend or relationship breakup. Let go that things didn’t work out and move ahead with your life. It isn’t easy, but is finally now possible.
Seeing someone who hurt you for the first time is one of the hardest things to do. If someone has ever hurt you, what tips do you have to handle this situation the right way?
Danila i think it's totally fine to hide from them if you're not ready for that confrontation or saying hi and smiling, it doesn't mean you're not over them or you're still hurt, it means you're done dealing with their shit , no need to sugarcoat feelings , if you don't want to talk walk away , doesn't make you weak nor cowardly.
splashhhh But dont u think it looks kinda dum not to show what happend and say hiiiiii!! There is somthing called self respect omg or worse what if u go say HI and they just walk by without answering aaaaaa
Heather This will help if I ever run into my parents. Or, I don\'t take the high road and go to jail for assault lol
antonia But what would you do if your ex contacts you after almost a year and tells you he wants to see u, drink a coffee be4 he leaves the country again. Would you meet him? I am confused. He hurt me alot in the past...i thnk it\'s the temptation of seeing he regrets me as a gf. Dunno what 2 do.
Denise Hi Antonia. Listen to your gut. If you don't want to see him, then don't be afraid to say no.
Lauren This really will come in handy when I see this person for the first time since they hurt me. I know it will hurt me deeply and I\'m so afraid old feelings will come back. it sickens me that they still have some control over me.
Maranda :sticker_smilling:
Yemane @Maranda
Vicky Meg.. Sorry for you!! Long time ago I ran into my first boyfriend with my fat body and messy bed head. His girlfriend stared at me and he gave me a dirty look and said to me he is too good for me that\'s why he dumped me. I sweared to myself it will never happen to me again. 9 months ago I walked away from my boyfriend and stop answering his call and text me. One time he came to see me I hide in the freezer. And three weeks ago, I was talking to my mom I accidentially answer his call. I agree to met him I smile, I look sexy and I keep my conversation short . He said baby I like new you, sexy hot and confident. When you moved on you don\'t really care him act confident but polite. That\'s so cool to see how much he want you back. Be prepared, you never know who you ran into. Could be your ex or your boss.
Maria Hi Heather, Great advice ! Thanks! Blessings!!!!!!!
Jillian Thanks. I dread the day I\'ll see both my exes (and we live in a rather small town so it\'s inevitable). I had the plan on what to do in my head,and you covered everything I think!
Jam @Jillian but at times even if you have all the means to handle it, when you\'re on d\' actual scenario --- its different
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