Let's talk about best friends. 💛 Bear with me regarding this concept because I am all about friendship 👬👫👭 in general and female friendship 👭 in particular. Let me tweak this idea a little. The idea of having just one single best friend is a little overrated. It needs a bit of a revamp, I think. We need to think on a wider scale. Think about the concept of BFFs as it existed when you were little and the pressure to have ONE TRUE BEST FRIEND was enormous and crushing. Think about the petty little fights you had, think about ripping off your BFF necklace 💔 and giving it to someone else, think about how many times the cycle repeated itself. Now, read this with an open mind and tell me what you think.
1 It's Just a Phrase
“Best friend” is just a phrase that, honestly, you can tack onto anyone who gets you, supports you, or makes you laugh – think about how many people you describe as your best friend.
Frequently asked questions
2 You Can Have More than One
You're not in grade school any longer, so there aren't a bunch of girls trying to dictate the rules of best friendship, meaning that you don't have to limit yourself to just one.
3 And, Honestly, You Probably Should
The more friends you are, the more support you have – and if you have more best friends, then there's more love to go around.
4 You Can't Get Everything You Need from a Single Person
No single person can give you everything you need all the time, and it's actually unfair to expect that, which is why it's not just fine to have more than one best friend, it's practically essential.
5 Different Aspects of Your Life Need Different Types of Support
You need a friend for different facets of your life – a work bestie, a school bestie, a wingwoman bestie, and so on.
6 It Puts Pressure on Your BFF, Too
If you have one designated BFF, did you ever stop to think that they might be under pressure to fulfill all of your friendship needs?
7 Plus, It Significantly Limits Your Relationships
By expecting a single person to fulfill all your needs as a friend, you're selling yourself short and losing out on so many potentially valuable relationships.
8 It's Kind of Insulting to Other Friends
Even as adults, it can be hurtful to hear a friend you really love refer to someone else as their best friend because, even if it's not the intent, it almost seems like that friend is saying you're not good enough.
9 Every Friend is an Individual
Meaning, they're more than just the labels we put on them.
10 Best Friends Change
I don't mean the individual changes, although that's certainly true, I mean that if you look back on it, you'll likely notice that you've had a new best friend at different junctures in your life.
11 And That Can Inhibit Growth
It sucks to say, but holding onto the idea of a single best friend can inhibit your personal growth, especially if you're only holding on because you've “been best friends for so long.”
12 One Best Friend Puts You in a Bind
What if you have a falling out and you're then left with no support system, simply because you're clinging to the idea that you can only have one single super best friend?
13 It Encourages Competition
That is, your current best friend may resent or dislike other close friends – and you might feel the same if your best friend has other close friends.
14 There's No Diversity
You need a diverse group of friends, not just to increase your support system or fulfill other aspects of your life, but because doing so opens your eyes and helps you to gain more perspective.
15 You Need Different People at Different Times
You need the friend who listens well when you're going through a hard time, the friend who parties when you need a distraction, and the friend who comforts when you need someone to hold you.
16 Friendship Isn't Monogamous
This isn't a romantic relationship so there's no reason to be “faithful” to a single friend.
17 There Are Just Too Many Potential BFFs out There
The thing is, when you have a best friend, you can get complacent and decide there's no more room in your life for additional friends … and that's kind of sad.
What do you think, stalkers? Agree, disagree, need to debate the topic?
