Going to college can be an exciting step into adulthood - but many people find that it's not as fulfilling as they thought it would be. College can be quite a lonely experience, especially if you're not so outgoing or don't like the partying lifestyle. It seems like everyone else is having a great time, while you're staying home, lonely and bored. So how can you start making friends at college, and avoid feeling lonely?
The first thing that you must do is to be proactive. A great social life and amazing friends won't just fall into your lap; you've got to get out there and make an effort to meet people. It won't happen overnight, and you shouldn't expect to make lifelong friends in your very first week. Make the effort to get to know people.
Every college has dozens of societies and groups, if not hundreds. Pick a few to try out and see what you like. Be adventurous and try something new, rather than just joining a sports club or drama group (although there's nothing wrong with that for meeting like-minded folks). There are so many groups that you're bound to hit on something you enjoy, and meet some great people.
Don't pass up an opportunity to talk to people. Even a passing conversation with someone you'll never meet again can lift your spirits if you're feeling lonely. You could also be introduced to someone who does become a good friend. It's all about networking, so get out there and chat to everyone!
If you're not the partying type, don't try to force yourself. You won't enjoy it or meet people on your wavelength. Instead, look for other types of entertainment, such as movie clubs or theater groups. These will get you out of the house and help you meet people.
Don't rule out church groups if you're feeling lonely; they can actually be a pretty good way of getting to know people. They're usually friendly and welcoming, even if you don't share their beliefs. It's also a good way of getting out into the community and meeting people, as many churches have a well-developed community program.
Most people feel a bit lost when they first go to college. And if all these people don't actually start talking to each other, everyone will stay lonely! So take the initiative and be the one to start conversations. If you never know how to start a chat, practice - think of some comments or questions you could use to start a chat.
Finally, if the loneliness is overwhelming you, seek help. Speak to your tutor or a campus counselor. Don't just suffer in silence. Whether you've experienced emotional problems before or are feeling lonely because of moving to this new place, they are there to help and have spoken to many students in the same position.
It's absolutely normal to feel lonely at college, so don't feel that you're the odd one out or that there's something wrong with you. There isn't - you're making a big transition in your life, and it's not always easy.