Here is a list of honest reasons to practice abstinence if you need a change of pace in your relationship. If you haven't had sex yet, this list is also encouragement for you to continue your lifestyle. I'll be totally honest with you ladies. I wasn't a virgin when I got married. But when my husband and I first started dating we discussed various reasons to practice abstinence and decided to give it a try. It ended up being one of the best decisions of my adult life and I'd like to share with you why.
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Clarity
Clarity is one of the many helpful reasons to practice abstinence. When we have sex with other people it can often cloud reality because of the emotional attachment that occurs. I'll share with you an example. I had a boyfriend in college who wasn't honest with me. I knew it in my gut but because I was so attached to him, I didn't listen to my better judgement. We were forced to have some time apart and as a result be celibate. I was able to see the situation for what it truly was and found the courage to end the relationship.
Control
If you want to have the upper hand, or at least a hand at all, in your relationship, abstaining from sex helps in this area. If you are sleeping with someone and they aren't committed to you then they are getting what they want and you end up with the short end of the stick. But if you decide to take control of the situation by having control over your body then you are in a position to make more controlled decisions within the relationship.
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Friendship
One of the greatest advantages to abstinence for me was that I became best friends with my husband. It took a lot of the pressure away when we decided to just focus on the other areas of our relationship and as a result I got to know him faster and deeper than I think I would have if we had sex. It forced us to talk things through if we had problems instead of turning to a quick fix.
Respect
I think that choosing abstinence really helps with self respect. Many of us have sex because we are seeking love or attention and if we don't get it then the experience can be damaging to our hearts and minds. When you abstain from sex, you are sort of forced to learn boundaries and you start to see your worth and all that you truly have to offer another person.
Love
Is it love or is it lust? I think it can be easy to confuse the two because we are often shown love as an intense, fleeting emotion. I guess the older I get, I am starting to see that love is more than that, it's an action. It's something you do, not something you just feel. So when you practice abstinence, it will give you the opportunity to truly grow in love with the other person.
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Peace of Mind
Sometimes we just need a break, don't we? If you find that your relationship is going through a rough patch, abstinence may give you some peace of mind as you sort things out. When you have peace of mind you can focus. If sex is the issue in your relationship then abstinence can help because it will give you the space and time to talk about what's wrong without the pressure of performance.
Know Yourself
Do you know who you are? That's a serious question. I found that during my season of abstinence, I really grew in my identity. This was always an area of struggle for me, who I was and what I was here for. When you know who you are, you are much more secure with yourself and can make wise decisions in life.
I know I mentioned relationships a lot, but even if you are single, abstinence could be a good choice for you. There are so many articles out there on sex tips and rightfully so, sex is why we are all here after all. But I wanted to offer you an alternative if it's in your heart to make a different choice for yourself. Have you made the decision to be abstinent?
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