Dealing with the Devastation of a Friend Breakup ...

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COMMENT

The loss of a friendship is even more devastating than the loss of a girlfriend or boyfriend, I think, especially if you're breaking up with an incredibly close friend.

Friends get you on a different level than lovers.

They provide you with different things, they nurture you in different ways, and you need them for different reasons.

Breaking up with a friend, or having a friend break up with you, can keep you down and depressed for a long time.

Dealing with that loss hurts because you feel like a piece of yourself is missing, but I think – I hope – that the advice here will help you.

1. Think about Why You Broke up

You need to do this because you need to own it.

Myriad things can break up a friendship, such as a move, a natural drift, or a lie.

Some wounds simply cannot be mended, but some can.

Understanding why you're drifting apart and owning your part are both necessary to try mending fences, but even if you can't, knowing the whys and wherefores of your breakup will ultimately help you cope.

2. Feel Your Feelings

A friendship break up really is like any other kind.

You need to take time to feel your feelings.

Process, think, grieve.

Trust me, the grieving part is important.

In fact...

3. Grieve, Seriously

You will feel absolute grief.

Why not?

An integral part of your life is now gone.

Someone on whom you depended is no longer part of your life.

Why wouldn't you grieve?

4. Don't Cyberstalk

This is important.

You'll be tempted, even more tempted than you are after a romantic breakup, because you know all of your friend's online hotspots, you know about the secret Instagram, the Tumblr, the Twitter she only uses to rant.

Steer clear of those spaces for the time being.

Give your friend some space and give yourself some space too.

Don't Talk Crap
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