Let's talk about the grey area of harassment. It was clear when the Weinstein scandal broke, there would be other revelations to come with it (I am sure there are still more coming). I watched the Affleck video this morning and I watched the girl. I felt for her. She was uncomfortable at times and yet she was doing an interview with a big Hollywood star. He is famous and she did not want to cause a scene. I sent this to a male and he replied, “So what?” He could not see Affleck did anything wrong and even said, “She looks happy.”
This is the grey area of harassment and it has been caught perfectly on tape here.
Guess what? A woman can think a man is attractive, funny, charming, and even want attention from him, and yet still not want him to grab her boobs! That is true and I suppose this is where the grey area appears.
Women are vulnerable. We are judged by our looks. We are the physically weaker sex, in many cases. In the cases of Affleck and Weinstein, women were also weaker in stature.
There is no doubt that some aspiring actresses slept with Weinstein to get a part in a film. When a scandal like this comes out, we are all shocked, but not shocked at the same time. Of course producers hold power over women. Of course this kind of thing is done and it is wrong. Again another grey area appears. What if the woman comes on to him?
Women were afraid of Weinstein, and I do believe that men who are in power, get away with a hell of a lot more than the average man. But saying that, ask your girlfriends how many times a man has crossed a line? How many times have you walked through a nightclub only to be mysteriously groped? How many times have you liked a man and enjoyed his company, only to then suddenly be surprised when he made a sleazy move? It has happened to everyone.
The worst thing about this scandal was Donna Karan saying that a woman is at fault for what she wore or the situation she somehow landed in. Even if a woman was naked, it is barbaric to argue that she was asking for it.
Any decent person would not want someone else to feel uncomfortable. Perhaps in Affleck’s case he was totally unaware of any discomfort the poor girl felt.
However from the alleged stories about Weinstein, it seems as if he enjoyed making women feel uncomfortable and enjoyed wielding power. When women are reduced to just how they look, it hurts everyone.
Guess what else? Women flirt too and have sex drives and are attracted to men. Women like dressing up and being admired. There is however, a line that is crossed and it seems that some men and women draw that line in different places. I have heard this so many times: “Men are simple to keep happy. They just like good food and good sex.”
Well I think men like being alpha males too. The comment from Weinstein that I found most revealing was when he was talking about his wife leaving him and how he had "encouraged" her to. Even then when he has been humiliated, deserted, and totally exposed, he still feels the need to assert some kind of power over the situation. That is pure ego and a deep wanting to show dominance, which continues to be a big problem.