7 Questions You Should Never Ask ...

By Chelsie • Jan 20, 2014

People are curious by nature and tend to ask a lot of questions, but there are some questions you should never ask. I always try to be polite when I am talking to people, and my politeness is always appreciated. In being polite, I have learned that there are certain questions that are generally considered very rude to ask. These questions tend to make people bristle up and feel like they are being judged or insulted. I always stay away from asking these questions. Unless you know the person really well, I suggest following this list of questions you should never ask.

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1. Income

Although it is considered extremely rude, some people still ask “How much do you make?” Even if you are very curious, avoid asking this question. Not only is it rude, but it can make people very uncomfortable. I know if someone asked me this question, I would feel like they were being very nosy. In all honesty, it is no one else’s business how much money a person makes. Unless the person offers up the information, inquiries about income are questions you should never ask.

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Income-related questions have a way of making conversations take an awkward turn. They intrude on personal boundaries and can instigate unnecessary comparison or judgment. Reflect on why you're curious about someone's financial status. If it isn't for a legitimate reason like a job interview where salary negotiation is expected, it's best to steer clear. We all have different responsibilities and financial journeys, so let's respect each other's privacy and focus on more enriching topics of conversation.

2. Weight

Have you ever had a person ask, “How much do you weigh?” If you have I am sorry because it is a very personal question that can make you feel like your space is being invaded. Of course, it is fine for doctors to ask this, but everyone else should avoid the question. It doesn’t matter if you are asking a person who is tiny, medium, or large because this question can make people feel very insecure. It can also make a person feel like they are being judged, and this is never a good thing. If your friend tells you that she or he lost weight, just say congratulations, there is no need to ask her or him what their current weight is.

3. Age

Unless you are talking to someone under the age of 15, I suggest avoiding asking people how old they are. In general, only little children appreciate this question. However, adults tend to dislike being asked their age. Even though I am in my late 20s, I am not a fan of being asked my age. Mostly because I know people think I look like I am 17, which isn’t a bad thing. However, I am glad to be finished with high school and would really prefer not to be reminded that I still look like I am in high school. Of course, there is the opposite end of the spectrum. People who feel they look older than their age don’t want to be reminded of that either. Age questions are risky and are best saved for little kids who show you with their fingers how old they are.

4. Marriage

It is just not kind to ask a person, “Why aren’t you married?” This question tends to come from family members, but that doesn’t make it an acceptable question to ask. Asking a person why they are not married implies that there is something wrong with being single, which is not the case. It is a question that makes people feel like their life choices are being judged. I think I have only had one person ever ask me this, and I really felt awful when they asked me. Having had the experience of being asked this question, I can honestly say it was not a pleasant experience. If someone isn’t married there are likely some very good reasons that they would probably prefer to keep to themselves.

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5. Hair Color

Asking someone if their hair color is real is never a good idea. Usually people color their hair for one of two reasons, either for a change or to hide their gray hairs. Since it can be hard to know which is the case, I suggest staying away from this question. People who are coloring their hair to hide grays don’t want their age to be highlighted. In fact, they are trying to look younger, and asking about their hair color won’t make them feel good about themselves. If you are curious because you want to have your hair colored the same color, you can always say, “I wish my hair was that color,” and see what they say.

6. Pregnancy

It is really risky to ask a woman when she is due if you don’t already know she is pregnant. More often than not, if you think a woman is pregnant she probably is. However, there are the few occasions when a woman looks pregnant when she isn’t. In this case, the question can be very hurtful. I always wait and see if the woman mentions that she is pregnant. If she doesn’t, I just accept that I will be left wondering.

7. Cost

It is generally not a good idea to ask someone how much they paid for something. This is another money question, and these types of questions tend to make people very uncomfortable. It can also make someone feel like their purchasing choices are being judged. If the item is something you would like to buy for yourself, simply ask if they would mind telling you where they purchased it because you would like to have one also. This avoids any topic of money, and if the person is nice they will help you find what you are looking for.

There are some questions that should never be asked. They can make people feel uncomfortable, feel like are being judged, or hurt their feelings. I always stay away from questions like these, especially with people I hardly know. What questions do you avoid asking?

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Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

  • Kenzie

    2014-01-20T23:25:35.000Z

    lol I'm 16 about to be 17 and I look like I am 12 :(
  • Ashlyn

    2014-01-21T04:36:16.000Z

    I went through a lot of bullying in highschool, people making fun of me because I looked pregnant. I always thought I just gained weight in my stomach. Come to find out, I had a 35Lb cystic mass on my right ovary that overtook my abdomen. It's made people feel very stupid for ever making fun of me. It always really hurt my feelings when people asked when I was due. I felt very accomplished in my age and area that I didn't/still don't have kids.
  • Ine

    2014-01-22T20:30:38.000Z

    Another question that makes me tired: "You are such a great seamstress, could you make a suit for me?" No. I cannot. I have a fulltime job and family (parents) who need my help. And besides that: I do not wish to be used.
  • Lystra

    2014-01-23T03:20:37.000Z

    People sure ask dumb question when they are more concern about who they are They should be more open to topics
  • EstherC

    2017-04-08T18:52:41.524Z

    Well, I have never had that problem but I think I would be very embarrassed to ask that question, even if a workmate smelt really bad. I don't know. No, I would never dare to ask something like that, even though it's probably more rude to smell badly than to ask the question you suggest.
  • Marissa

    2014-01-21T22:45:48.000Z

    I can see this being taboo when you are talking to a stranger but when you are having a conversation with people you know and talk to often, this entire article is shot. when you're getting to know people a few of these questions will come up.
  • Ine

    2014-01-22T20:27:42.000Z

    Why am I single? Because I like my freedom too much!!
  • Camille

    2014-01-21T04:04:35.000Z

    I agree with most of these but I think ppl care too much about ppl asking their age, I honestly don't care it's not that big of a deal. Weight is a no no, even asking someone how much weight they've lost is rude, just tell them they look great. I get asked why I am not married, it's very awkward, how do you answer that (bc I am a psycho gf? Lol jk).
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