Marrying the love of your life is like a dream come true but if you’re not on your mother-in-law’s good side it could quickly turn into a nightmare so I’ve rounded up 7 ways to charm your mother-in-law! Use these tips to get in her good graces and enjoy peace between your families. You don’t have to be BFF’s with your new MIL unless you want to be, just keep things cordial and friendly and it’s all good!
1. Play Nice
Assuming your mother-in-law hasn’t been the friendliest or most delightful person in the world; one of the best ways to charm your mother-in-law or at least get the ball rolling is to always be polite! Even if she comes off as standoffish or fake, stand your ground and be nice. In fact, kill her with kindness if need be! Don’t play games or be sarcastic, mind your manners and don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself, just don’t get caught up in her game and lower yourself to her standards if she insists of being mean.
2. Get to Know Her
You can’t judge a book by its cover so make sure you’re not making the same mistake with your mother-in-law and make an effort to get to know her as one of the steps in how to get along with your mother-in-law. She could have had some bad blood with her own mother-in-law making her very weary of getting too friendly or close with you. She could also be just super protective of her little boy who you would never hurt so make an effort to ask her questions about her life and get to know what she’s like outside of being a mom.
3. Give Her Time
Your mother-in-law probably doesn’t get much one on one time with her son anymore so be sure to give them space when they’re together-it’s a sure way to get along with your mother-in-law and get on her good side! Let your hubby spend his own time with his family and don’t feel left out if you’re not included in everything, allowing your man to have quality time with his family will show his mom that you’re not trying to change him or take him away from them.
4. Talk It out
Another one of the useful ways to charm your mother-in-law is to talk things out with the hubs. Let him know what you’re going through and how you feel about the situation and get his input. He knows her pretty darn well so he probably can give you some good insight into what makes her tick! Don’t be defensive or call her names, remember this is his mother we’re talking about! Ask him for advice on connecting with his mom and that you genuinely want to form a bond with her.
5. Avoid Competition
If you want to know how to get along with your mother-in-law, avoid competing with her at all costs! If your husband considers her the best cook in the world, let it be and don’t try to one-up her by trying to be the new best cook in the family. Remember that there is room for both of you in your man’s life so don’t feel like you have to outdo her in any way or feel threatened by her. Your husband fell in love with you for a reason, not because you’re a carbon copy of his mom!
6. Flatter Her
One of the most effective ways to charm your mother-in-law is to sincerely compliment her on things that she does well or things that you admire about her. Communicating to her that you admire her talents and skills in a genuine way will show her that you’re paying attention and appreciate what all she does! Don’t forget to thank her for raising such a wonderful man too!
7. Be Clear
One of the most valuable lessons to learn in how to get along with your mother-in-law is to be open and be clear in communicating. You don’t have to tolerate anyone criticizing you or your family, so don’t feel like she can get away with saying whatever she wants. At the same time, be sure the two of you are communicating effectively and that you clarify any misunderstandings that may occur. Misunderstandings can really ruin relationships so make sure you always clear things up and clear the air!
Becoming part of a new family can be challenging but there are definitely ways to make it work and lots of useful ways to charm your mother-in-law! Remember that she was once in your position too so try to put yourself in her shoes and do your best to get along with your new family!
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